If you put words to the places God takes your heart when you have a little time to think, what would you say? What kind of beauty would come out of your mouth if you were able to get those thoughts out of your head and into your reality. Who would listen? Who would connect with you because you were honest? What if there really is something to this vulnerability thing and you are missing out simply because you are too busy or too scared to get real?
In my MOPS group this year our theme is Be You Bravely, and each time I hear women speak on this topic, I get this overwhelming urge to write that I know is from the Lord, but I quickly feel myself resist because I don’t have the time or energy to take the thoughts that God has given me and write them out in a way that is coherent and meaningful. I just don’t do a very great job balancing my own dreams and goals with the day to day reality of life with small children and I am not sure that I truly have something unique to say that hasn’t been said by a dozen other moms a hundred times before.
But yet—I am drawn to this idea that writing about my reality is my way to “Be You Bravely.” So here is a feeble attempt to say something real–not knock your socks off awesome—but real. Because there IS beauty in the real. There is something about connecting at our points of weakness that strengthens us–especially when what we say isn’t unique and isn’t incredible but is common to the experiences of others in a similar life stage (like being a mom of preschoolers)
If I could take the thoughts from my head in my most real moments here is what I would share because these are the things on my mind when my life allows my brain to string two or more thoughts together. You know that minute in the shower before any of the kids realize you are trying to be alone, or that two minutes at night before you fall into a dead sleep or those seemingly endless hours washing dishes because the only way to make your family disappear is to offer to let them help load the dishwasher. Here is where my mind takes me when I have a moment to pause and reflect and be real with myself.
I think about….
How I wish I knew how to go deep in my friendships with other women
How I wish I could move beyond getting angry with my children
How much I wish someone magical would show up to help me with the housework so I didn’t have to be responsible for that
How afraid I really am of not making a difference in the world
How much I really get annoyed by being interrupted, climbed on, constantly needed, and daily getting pushed to the limits of my patience by my three littles and honestly, sometimes my husband.
How much I hope that my children choose to follow Christ wholeheartedly despite my parenting missteps.
How much God has used my failures to teach me to trust him
How much I hope that God continues to grow my marriage and helps me be an encouragement to my husband
How I truly want to be who God created me to be–whatever that looks like.
How much I want to see God move powerfully in my little piece of the world so I (and others of course) can daily experience His greatness.
How I wish I could take a break from being a grown up and all the responsibility and burden that just hangs around my life waiting for me to respond to it.
How about you? Where does your mind go when you are raw and real with yourself? Who would be encouraged if you took the time to put the beauty of the real into words that others can hear or read? What would happen is you had the courage to Be You Bravely starting now?